Law 1: The Field of Play
Dimensions:
The field of play must be rectangular. The length of the touch line must be greater than the length of the goal line.
Length: minimum 90 m (100 yds), maximum 120 m (130 yds)
Width: minimum 45 m (50 yds), maximum 90 m (100 yds)
Field Markings:
The field of play is marked with lines. These lines belong to the areas of which they are boundaries.
The two longer boundary lines are called touch lines. The two shorter lines are called goal lines.
All lines are not more than 12 cm (5 ins) wide.
The field of play is divided into two halves by a halfway line.
The center mark is indicated at the midpoint of the halfway line. A circle with a radius of 9.15 m (10 yds) is marked around it…….

Yaaarda Yaaarda Yaaawn… I think we all get the picture??

Law 1: Application to Real Life…

Our life is defined by the field of play… It’s definition can be designed by us or by others.. It is our choice as to whose definition/s we follow…

Yeeeeaahh I know waaay too deep maaaann…

Lets simplify.

Lets say for example your field of play is called Glenda.

Now Glenda is bang up for a bit of play in her field yet she feels the need to define what that play can be and by crikey who can actually play on her field…

This is called home ground advantage…

You’re the away team…

You’ve been in the smelly bus with plenty of other smelly blokes downing a few brewski’s getting ready for the big match at Glenda…

You hop off the bus and you’re stinging to have a play on Glenda’s field after all that time talking it up with your mates… You spy Glenda over there by the condiments machine… You’re eyes meet… A twitch forms at the right side of your gob in anticipation… All sound stops… Glenda nods her consent… The crowd roars as you trot merrily onto Glenda’s hallowed turf!!!!

This is IT! the BIG match!!! Hurrah!

Glenda has home ground advantage here, everything you do is based on her definition of The Field of Play…

Don’t dribble too much!! She’ll penalise you a free kick in the box.
If you shoot to soon??? Well that may be deemed to be an own goal…
You find you’re not making sense?? Pass man PASS!! Use your mates to help you out here… Take the easy option… Don’t make it difficult…

This way you get more of a say in the rules of the field of play… Don’t get bogged down by dimensions!! Man! Use your noggin’ and pretty soon Glenda will have you over all the time to play on her field…

She will eventually get bored of this and want to play an away match herself… Have a crack on your field of play..

THAT”s when YOU get home ground advantage!!

That’s when you get to throw your hands up high and yell to the heavens….

“GOOD HEAD!!!”

More later on transfers…

And for the record, they are the “Rules of Association Football”

Lets look at the Advantage Rule:
In Soccer
A clause in the rules that gives the Referee the discretion to allow play to continue even after a foul has been committed if stopping play would unfairly punish the fouled team (e.g., if the fouled team had a breakaway & might score even after having been fouled). The idea is that the team which committed the foul should not gain an advantage as a result of the foul. (See “Fouls”).
Application to everyday life:
A mate of yours loves getting on the piss and cracking on to everyones girlfriend. The thing is though, when he gets on the piss he’s great at shouting a few brewski’s for the boys… The dilemma here is do you cruel your chances of getting free beer by stopping him cracking onto your girl?? Well of course we all know the answer to that is “NO!!”

You play the Advantage Rule…
After accepting your third shout from the offending player you disentangle him from your girl, throw a manly smile to her, then adroitly point out to him how attractive Mrs Jehoosevitz and her breasts are looking over there by the condiments machine. Whilst telling him that it’s his shout again…
When he’s on his way to paradise you shake your head in that manly way again and accept the gushing thanks from your girl knowing full well you’ll reap the benefits that night back at the work bench.. Heheh

Advantage played no one loses..

Good site Tezz…

Cbead, great suggestions, maybe i should have consulted Kickoff before launching. I was hoping you could come up with some Middle East tips . I will talk to a mate of mine who travels there often though.